A couple weeks before Christmas, I got suckered into a silly Facebook argument by Spinetingler Magazine's editor Brian Lindenmuth and Englishman Jay Stringer about the superiority of VERONICA MARS to high school noir legacy BRICK, starring the immortal Joseph Gordon-Levitt. I was bracing to call Brian an uneducated fool for no reason whatsoever, except that I disagreed with him when a subtle detail dawned upon me: I had never watched the freakin' show.
Here I am, twelve weeks removed from this moment, discussing VERONICA MARS on my blog. This is why I try my best to stay off Facebook arguments, ladies and gentlemen. They are a contemporary form of slavery. They wolf down your existence and next thing you know, you've been arguing for the last decade or so with people you never actually met instead of, you know, being a person. I still have no idea how to properly review a television series, so you'll have to make with the cliff notes.
- Goddamnit, Lindenmuth was right. VERONICA MARS is noticeably better than BRICK. Why wouldn't it be. The latter clocks in at 110 minutes, and the former has 40 something hours worth of material. It's difficult to be subtle when you discuss high school in fiction - mainly because people tend to romanticize the shit out of their high school years - yet subtleties and nuances can only be found once you've established a familiarity with your audience. If you have 11 seconds to make a point and his neighbor has 4 and a half minutes, chances are you're not going to be the most convincing of the two.
- If someone kipdnapped your child and forced you to watch a full season of VERONICA MARS in order to earn his/her freedom, watch season 1. It has a wisecracking destitute socialite sleuth, a midget Mexican bodybuilder leading his own high school motorcycle club, a major league overarching storyline that rivals the best hardboiled novels, major league smoking guns, a Californian class warfare and lots of adorable assholes. Season 2 and 3 are very enjoyable in their own right, but they don't quite measure with the mayhem of season 1. It's a very Hammett-ian blend of hardboiled and wisecracking humor.
- The theme song will become your best friend and your worst enemy. It's a scientific experiment in earworming that'll both haunt you in your every waking hour and make you deliriously happy whenever it plays because it announces 45 minutes of awesome. I'm sure whoever watched the series has pressed play already. Just remember me wheeeennnnn!!!
- I believe VERONICA MARS is one of these series that has been focused grouped to death, yet every strange decision it prompted turned out to be awesome. Among the greatest hits: bangs that only lasted one episode, a mysterious mother that dropped off the face of the Earth after two episodes, and my absolute favourite; prototypical boyfriend Duncan Kane getting usurped by resident smartass Logan Echolls as Veronica's main love interest and subsequently exiting the series in the strangest possible way (no spoilers!). It's fair to say Duncan's exist was the strangest thing that happened in the series, yet nobody was sad to see him go.
- Speaking of Logan Echolls, what an awesome character. Probably my favourite in the entire series alongside doofus sheriff Don Lamb. Played by the inimitable Jason Dohring, Logan's a self-loathing trust fund kid who despises what his family stands for, yet clearly enjoys the wealth and privilege, so it translates in unhealthy amounts of passive-aggressiveness and sexually ambiguous necklaces. It's too bad series creator Rob Thomas doesn't seem to know what to do with Logan and transforms him into a moping boyfriend in season 3, because he would've been the greatest sidekick to Veronica. They could've been the Nick and Nora Charles of the 21st century together. Oh well.
- If you're afraid that the series will break your heart after it's over, please know that there is a movie (that was financed on freakin' Kickstarter) and two novels: THE THOUSAND DOLLAR TAN LINE and MR. KISS AND TELL. Rob Thomas' a novelist and Veronica Mars is a wanted commodity, so there are no telling when the gravy train might stop.
- Another detail that's nice: of course the series casted a bunch of 30 year olds pretending to be in high school, but it also follows their evolution in real time. Every season equals to one year of their lives, so in a way, the series had an expiring date from day one, but it's a good thing. The best stories all know when to end, so they don't overstay their welcome.
If you've read this and still believe that I'm going soft (Backstreet Boys one week, Veronica Mars the other), do as I did and watch a couple episodes in order to prove your point. You'll eventually end up right where I am now. Peace out!
