*Charlie Sheen has went into so many rants for the last weeks, I thought putting up a photo was simpler than digging up the entire audiovisual artifacts*What's the big deal?: Hollywood's perennial loser Charlie Sheen is obviously off his rocker. He looks exhausted, cracked out and far beyond any possible help. And he doesn't seem to give a shit. Since he's been hospitalized for "severe abdominal pains" and then arrested, he has taken on himself to become a living meme. He went on a media blitz, managed to get fired from Two And A Half Men (a show based on him) and to blurt out some of the greatest quotations ever made by a celebrity in distress. Here are a few of my favorites:
"I have a different constitution. I have a different brain; I have a different heart; I got tiger blood, man."
"I'm dealing with fools and trolls and soft targets. It's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee. I don't have time for these clowns."
"Slash sat me down at his house and said, You've got to clean up your act. You know you've gone too far when Slash is saying: "Look, you've got to get into rehab."
"I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time - and this includes naps - I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground."
"Slash sat me down at his house and said, You've got to clean up your act. You know you've gone too far when Slash is saying: "Look, you've got to get into rehab."
"I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time - and this includes naps - I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground."
Why is it so funny?: Never before in existence somebody wore failure as well as Sheen does. He's literally having the best moments of his career. Thanks to a well-advised move of signing-in to Twitter, the entire planet is now tuned in to what Charlie Sheen has to say next. Even Hollywood's resident cultural snob Brett Easton Ellis came out of his compound to enlighten us about the cracked out actor's master plan. While I think he is wrong and that we are the only moving power behind a celebrity's despair, force is to admit that Sheen was never that successful when he tried...well...to succeed!
Two And A Half Men gave Sheen stable employment and an image of lovable loser that could have cemented his legacy as something else than a half-baked movie star. He could've have been a legit television star. Many limited actors are. *Ahem* David Caruso *Ahem* But not when you have tiger blood. Charlie Sheen is destroying himself (according to what he says, it's nothing new), but he's on his way to become immortal, thanks to the internet, his fierce set of balls and to celebrity culture. Move over The Biggest Loser, we need a show on Charlie called The Best Loser.
